Are Men and Women Equally Emotional: Different Perception of Emotions

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Table of Contents

  • Introduction
  • The Emotional Capacity of the Male Brain
  • Emotional vs. Cognitive Empathy for Men and Women
  • Evolutionary Factors: Men and Emotional Expression
  • Societal Expectations: Suppressing Male Emotions
  • The Power of Emotional Vulnerability in Men and Women
  • Conclusion


Until recently, it was believed that differences in the way men and women feel and express their emotions were solely due to education and the socio-cultural environment. While it is true that we are programmed differently from men and women, especially in childhood and adolescence, it is also true that there are biological differences that explain the fact that we are not equal. One of the main questions society always poses is - are men and women equally emotional? In my experience, I know that one of the main accusations of men against women is that they are too emotional and that women often complain that men are unable to feel (or at least express) them.

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The Emotional Capacity of the Male Brain

I will give you a daily example, similar to the previous one, so that you can understand well: for example, there is a situation in which a man faces his partner, listens as she tells him while crying, his boss. He treats her badly. At that moment, the brain of the human activates the mirror neuronal system: this means that its mirror neurons are put to work and that the man feels the same emotional pain as his wife.

Emotional vs. Cognitive Empathy for Men and Women

This is what we call emotional empathy. So far, the process is the same for men and women; However, brain analysis and solution search circuits are activated in the human brain, which is the same as cognitive empathy. The man does not feel the emotions of his partner anymore, because this part of the brain offers a clear border between the emotions of the other and himself. Thus, free from the emotions of other people, people can devote all their energy to finding solutions.

Evolutionary Factors: Men and Emotional Expression

It seems, then, that the mission of humanity in the course of evolution has been to find solutions to the problems encountered in order to stay alive, hence the need to prevent emotions from blurring judgment. This explains why men are generally less emotional than women.

Other interesting data that explain this theory are:

• Some researchers believe that men have kept their beards to look brighter and hide their true emotions.

• In the male hierarchy of primates and humans, the face of anger serves to maintain power and matches men with more testosterone

And what does society say when a man expresses his feelings? Socially, it is unlikely that men express their feelings and yet no one is surprised by a furious man. And while it may seem like a lie, many men suffer from it. The undeniable message of society is that men must be strong, independent and courageous. We are becoming more and more eager to prevent anxiety and pain, to hide our most tender emotions and to face challenges with strength and security.

Societal Expectations: Suppressing Male Emotions

In addition to reinforcing the evolutionary trait, this impact has cut us off. The search for solutions does not make us less human: we feel, but we have learned not to pay attention to our emotions. In my case, I have been working with my emotions for several years and this can still make it difficult to get in touch with anger or sadness. I almost never cry, and when I do it, it's because of nonsense. Last time, I watched the movie Pele, the footballer.

I was on both sides of the plane, so nobody would notice that I was crying because Pele and his local friends had won the Benjamín championship. In recent years, I have discovered a greater strength than that of the man who twists everything he feels to look strong. It's about the power of vulnerability. When a member of one of my circles of people can share his problems and those for whom he feels less secure, he automatically wins the respect, empathy and even admiration of the majority.

The Power of Emotional Vulnerability in Men and Women

Being a man and being vulnerable is also sexy, every woman can tell you. The older we are, men and women. It has been proven that, hormonally, the brain of an adult man is more like that of a woman. Testosterone loses its presence and scientists believe that with a different balance in the fuels that feed their brains, humans might be more receptive to oxytocin, the hormone of hugs and affection. This would explain why some women are attracted to older men than they are, or why some problem pairs improve with age.


One conclusion on this point is that if you are a man, you allow yourself to make contact with these emotions to lead a more fulfilling life. The next time you feel vulnerable, try sharing it and you'll see what happens. It's magic. And if you are a woman, I invite you to create a secure space so that men can share these emotions without judgment and show their most vulnerable part. 

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