These days I am going through a lot. And when I say a lot. It could be a different meaning for each person who is going to read this. For some a lot means more than one can handle, one person`s a lot could be very less for another. So, let`s see what my alot is compared to your alot. So, while I was submitting my form to get in the collage I was really very exited that what it is to be in a collage. Because most people I know who know about something about collage says. You are going to enjoy it. Being in collage is like being yourself. You don`t have to attend a class if you don`t want to and no one is going to punish you for not attending the class. But none of those person didn`t tell me about that can course you short attendance. I completed my high school from the stream IT (vocational course). And I can say those two years were the best time I ever had in my life. Not because I enjoy everything with my friends but the study was easy to for me at least because everything comes in the exam I already know because it was the stuff that I already knew from the school because I have a subject of computers in my secondary school. Even if teacher teaches a new thing I enjoyed learning it. Because it was something that is really interesting and going to help me in future. But when I select BCA from all the courses available my admission form for the first year. I never know what it is like. Because in my secondary school I don`t study well because all was stuff like trigonometry and all like those were the things that are not going to help me ever in my life because I know I am not going to use them anywhere.
Second thing is I love science but the science that we were taught in the school was somehow useless because it was the same tings which my parents studied when they were students in the school and I was like. Haven’t science achieved or found out new discoveries since my parents was reading these same books when they were in the school. Like NASA found around 20 planets in our Soler system but our books says it still has 8 I was really shocked that they our books were really updated at lest they removed Pluto because it was a decision not to include Pluto in planets list. And then NASA also found water on moon and other planets but according to our books earth is the only place which has water. NASA found our that hottest planet is Venus, but our book says it`s still mercury. I also like to read stuff which is extra ordinary like stuff about aliens files that were hidden from the normal people then I found out that Our freedom fighter Subash chander boss was actually not died on the date they told us in our books and that was confirmed by his own family. So, like this I loosing interest in study because it was useless to me. But when I got into high school I leaned things which are really as they are. But now history repeats itself. After getting into BCA I found out that all I was stressed about during my Secondary education while I was a boy who watches Cartoon and anime. Same thing can be putting me in depression when I am still a boy who watches cartoon and anime but has a voter card in his pocket. In BCA we are learning things which I know not going to use in my life ever again from the moment I write those things in my answer sheet of my final exams. But now I have found out some stuff that I like to do like Blogging, making websites, debates by genius minds, dubbing stuff, video editing, playing or making games. So Now I am really stressed that why shouldn`t I give time to the stuff that I like rather than wasting it on stuff that is not going to help me ever again.
And I say that my studies are not going to help me ever again because I want to be an entrepreneur I don`t want to get a regular job. But as I say I want. Not my family, they want me to do a regular job so that I can support my family in future and I also want to do that but by doing stuff that I like. I love technologies and computers and that`s why I choose BCA because I think they will teach me stuff like new technologies and designing new things where I can use the little creativity I have to make new things. That I did when I leaned web designing. But after getting into BCA I found out in BCA things are not that way that I think it is. Rather than teaching new things where a student`s creativity can be used they just teaching stuff which is written in the books. But then I found our what they are teaching is also good because it is the things that I really should know in the field of technology. But when I made up my mind that Doing BCA is really cool I got a surprise that I have to lean programming and maths. Now I can do programming but I hate maths not because it is complicated or anything but because it is the thing that I not going to use ever. I am never going to find the value of “x” in my life. But then they are subjects that I really liked in which I found about devices that I was unaware of I learned new things about programming. But the real things that I don`t like BCA anymore is because there are restrictions of books to learn are unnecessary things filled in the syllabus which are useless to me. I mean who invented ‘C’ language, when was it created, how was it created, what can this language do or can`t do these things are really cool. But, what I have to do with a program which shows how to reverse a number. But when I got into next semester I got to know they’re was a reason for those things to learn because they were the examples of concepts that we learned later. But in every semester, there is some subject that drag my interest to zero every time. Now, you may be thinking what`s wrong with him. This is the story with almost every student. Why he uses words like stress or depressed for such a common thing. But, as I told you before one person`s alot could be very little for another. But the real things is I started questioning myself do you really wanted to do the BCA, do you like what you doing, if you leave BCA how will you got graduated, because at least graduation is at least the lowest education I expect from myself.
Can you don the BCA without overthinking stuff, if you leave BCA and pursue something in our interest like Video editing or something can you make enough from it so that you can support you family, But if you do BCA you will not get marks that are enough to get a job anyway so why don`t leave it, but I really like computers and technology then why should I leave BCA, if I leave BCA all the money and time me and my parents have putted in it till date will be wasted, If I graduated From BCA will I was able to get equal returns from BCA, do I have the potential of doing the BCA or I don`t, do I have potential of making out my bread my own or not, shouldn`t I drop out of BCA and do correspondence from BA while pursuing my interest but if I drop out of BCA and do correspondence and I couldn`t make out something from pursuing my career in my interest like blogging because it is a really very competitive field. I even started thinking about my own existence that what am I who am I what am I thinking and why. I started questing everything that I know from the day I was born to the day you are reading this. Now this is something for me is a lot. And the main reason I use words like stress or depressed because, whenever I start studying I stop myself by thinking it not going to help me in life than why waste time on it. But I am not a genius to make extra ordinary things so that I drop out of college and make thing that, ‘Mark Zuckerberg’ or ‘Bill gates’ did. I am just an ordinary boy who want to do something do something that he likes but the wheel of the world doesn`t revolves that way.
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