Lesson I Learned from My Dad About Friendship: Importance of Having Diversity-oriented Mindset and Welcoming Different Cultures


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Never judge a book by its cover is a phrase that some people never understand its meaning fully although it can be interpreted in various ways, it should bring up a common meaning. This is well illustrated by my father who before his death had very little enemies than friends. He was a social man who always emphasized on being and doing good to others. He was a senior person in the army and as many people say that soldiers are less interactive, my dad was different from that and it is through his social behaviour and caring as well as advocacy for peace that made me who I am today.

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My nuclear family consisted of five people. Dad, mom, my elder brother who is our first born, my younger sister, and myself. This means that we are two brothers and a sister. My father died when I was 14 years old and my elder brother was 22. We used to live an upper social class lifestyle and both were down to earth. It came a time after my dad had retired from the army that he started complaining of back pains every time after he did a slight task at home. When he went to the hospital for a medical checkup, he was diagnosed with spinal cancer. His medication process began and it reached a time that he could not move on his own despite having visited different hospitals for his wellbeing. By this time, my elder brother was finishing his university first bachelor’s degree.

About My Family

My mother used to work as a lecturer at a local university and she was forced to seek for a month off in order to take a close care to my father. As time went by, my father’s condition continued to deteriorate day by day. There came a time that he felt that his time to depart the world has come and he summoned all of us. He claimed that he wanted to leave us with words of wisdom before he could die. Everyone was eager to hear what our father wanted to tell us. After we gathered together around his hospital bed, he called closer to him and held my hand. He said that “I am dying and what I wanted to tell you is that, I am leaving to another world as a wealthy man and I am leaving enough of it to cater for every one of you.’ I felt that my father was not serious about what he was saying and I found myself shouting with anger saying, ‘what do you mean dad and you have almost spent every penny that you had saved before in your medication.’ Before he could respond to me, he took his last breath and died. This made every one of usbreak in tears.

Since from my young age, I have been reluctant in making friends and I always used to keep as minimal friends as possible and I could even find myself breaking up with many of my friends. It was my wish to keep and make as many friends as possible but I found that I could not have a sustainable friendship even when I forced myself. I even sometimes used to quarrel a lot with my elder brother more so when he interfered with my belongings. Again, I never believed in multicultural tolerance but I used to live my own life free from being interfered by any. That is the reason as to why I could not keep friends or sustain a friendship for long more for friends from different cultures. This continued until I came to learn about what it meant by tolerating multiculturalism because having a diversity-oriented mindset as well as welcoming different cultures to one’s life is vital. This meant a lot of sense when I came to realize what my father meant by wealth and words of wisdom.

My elder brother had finished university level and was looking forward to getting a job first before he could enroll for his master’s degree level. The purpose was to get some exposure on his field as he had pursued a mechanical engineering course. It came a time that my mother also fell sick. This meant that the little money that my mother had saved had to cater for his medical expenses, our school fees, and house rent payment together with other bills. This is what prompted my brother to seek employment first before proceeding with education. He could not get a sustainable employment until one time when he was called for an interview in an engineering company.

Lessons From Life

My father’s name was Max Bett. And this is the name that turned my life completely when I came to learn what it meant to the community. When my brother entered the interviewing room, one of the senior panelists stared at him and asked whether he knew a man by the name Max Bett. My brother said that he was his father. The interview mood in the room changed and everyone forgot about what he was to be asked. Instead, the interviewers started murmuring and finally, the senior panelist told him that they have gone through his CV and found that he was the right candidate to be hired for that position of a senior departmental engineer. His allowances involved a car and the company offered to support the rest of us to finish up our education. My mother’s hospital bills were catered for by the company and it offered to sponsor my brother’s education to higher levels.

Later on, we came to learn that the senior panelist used to work with my father in the army and it is my father who made him who he was and when the man retired the army he opened an engineering company and he was the CEO. The man was an Asian-American and he had fled his country after his stepbrothers threatened to kill him after the parents who adopted him died in a road accident. He was adopted in that particular family and his stepbrothers never wanted him to inherit even a cent from their parents as he was just an adoptee. I came to learn, it was the reason as to why my father never chose whom to help. He never chose culture or race and that is what meant our lives change dramatically to what we used to be before. Up to date, I am always holding communal teachings on the importance of multiculturalism and diversity as well as the benefits of interacting and helping the needy in the society. My life took a new turn from then.


Having a flexible mind is something that is very important in one’s life. My dad never chose whom to help and never considered from what cultural background one came from. Everyone was important to him and the society in general. Having a positive approach to relationships is of much importance and this is what changed my life. I never thought that one day I could be of much importance to the society but from the lesson that I learned from my father, I came to understand that everyone is a member of the society and people should look forward to giving back to the society whenever they realize the meaning of life and brotherhood.

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