My Personal Understanding of Leadership


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Me And My Friend

Friends can challenge us, confuse us, and we may wonder why we’re bothering at times. But for our well-being, friendship is as important as eating and exercising. Moreover, friendships help us grow through our lives each year. My best friend’s name is Nil Fenercioglu, she’s the daughter of my dad’s best friend. My dad introduced us when we were eight, during the summer. When I first met her, we connected instantly, and we became very close after just one day of spending time with each other. We started to meet up every week and quickly developed an unbreakable bond. Nil is a person that I admire a lot; she has the qualities that I look for in a person that I would like to be best friends or even feel as if I am sisters with, being an only child. She is incredibly positive, open minded, funny, honest, good hearted, trust worthy, open, confident, loyal…

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I’m Proud of My Best Friend

The one quality that amazes me about her is how open and confident she is, because growing up I was very shy and unconfident due to all the surgery scars that I have on my body and I was scared of people’s judgements about me. She always starts conversations with everyone she encounters, from a barista, an employee at a store to a middle-aged woman and a businessman working for a popular firm. Nil treats everyone equally with respect and kindness no matter who they are, from which social class they belong to, where they are from, where they work… Another quality I love about her is that she is genuine, whenever a conflict occurs between us, she directly faces me and tries to solve the problem and doesn’t go around and talk badly behind my back. I feel like her energy is contagious in a good way, whenever I’m with her I feel more confident and start being more open with people. I mimic what she does, and it makes me feel better.

A Friend’s Support is Important

I consider Nil my best friend because I trust her with all my heart, I can depend on her and I know whatever happens she will always be there for me, support me with the decisions that I take that will impact me in a good way; however she will never support decisions I take that could potentially harm me or have a bad consequence on me. For me a friend is someone that I have a certain level of reciprocity and attitude similarity with. I wouldn’t want to be friends with someone that is completely opposite to me and someone who isn’t capable to understand me and my feelings. “Friends are people I have much more frequent contact with and I can put more trust in them […] I share much of my life with them and they share their life with me.” When I ask her to keep a secret, I know it stays with her and that she wouldn’t share it with anyone not even a family member or her other close friends. If something bad happens to me, for instance If I get into an accident, I’m certain that she will be one of the first persons to show up immediately at the hospital, she will take care of me and shell even sleep in a chair in my hospital room if I want her too. One day, if I become broke or homeless, I know that I can stay at her house, that shell support me, try to help me, lend me money without expecting anything in return. Whenever I ask her, if my outfit is ok, I’m confident that she will tell me the truth and not let me get out of the house with an outfit that doesn’t look good on me or fit me well. I’m not afraid to text or call her at a late time. I feel like I can disturb her at whatever hour I want since I’m sure she won’t get mad or furious and the same thing applies for her. I feel very secure and comfortable when I’m around her, I can be one hundred percent myself. She cares about me, listens to me and respects my feelings. In our 8 years of friendship she has never betrayed me and never broken my trust. Even if she’s busy she always makes time for me when I need her.

Sincere Friendship is Happiness

As an illustration one day she had a very important final for the next day and I was heartbroken due to a breakup with my ex-boyfriend, I called her, and we talked on the phone for two hours. I don’t need to see or talk with her every day to know that she will always be on my side, especially when I need her the most. Nil is a friend since she would never hold my failures and imperfections against me, she knows that I’m a human being, I’m not perfect and that I’m capable of making mistakes like everyone but will love me anyway.
Nil is very special to me because she’s been by myside on my best and worst days. Every time we meet up something really funny ends up happening, that later on we remember when we discuss about it and laugh. I grew up and matured with her. Normally I don’t like to share much about my personal life with my friends but, she is the second person to know every single thing, detail about me and my family after my cousin. I also know everything about her and her family. She listens to what I’ve got to say to her carefully even if it’s boring, sad, depressive, meaningless and doesn’t shift her concentration elsewhere. In my opinion on of the most important factors in friendships and close bonds with people is accepting each other. She doesn’t try to change me, and loves me the way I am. I can talk to her about anything even if sometimes I don’t make sense, she doesn’t judge me.

Whenever I’m sad, she can read through me, I don’t have to explain myself to her. She doesn’t force me to talk with her and explain myself when I’m sad. I had and still to this day have some of my best memories with her. Normally with my other close friends, time to time we have arguments, sometimes tell each other things that know will hurt one another out of anger, but with Nil even if we are upset with each other we have never said anything purposely to harm one another. If necessary, shell do something for me that she would have never done for someone else even for herself. For example, she is extremely scared of heights, for my birthday she went on the fastest and highest roller-coaster at Disney nine times in a row to make me happy. We had so many crazy things happen to us that I will never forget. Whatever happens one hug from her makes things instantly seem better. Nil has this ability to make me laugh even if nothing happens her existence is enough sometimes to make me laugh. She gives me courage to do things that I would’ve never done alone. She forces me to get out of my comfort zone.

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