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On the Fear of Death by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross: What is Grief

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Grief is a way different people express their feelings about the loss they have suffered. Loneliness and depression are a normal part of the process of healing, not a sign of weakness. Grief is a naturally occurring emotion that affects almost every human being who has lost a loved one. In the process of healing, individuals are likely to develop continuing bonds. Continuing bonds are attachments maintained rather than relinquished. In the case of a widow or widower, it helps them keep healthy while still attached to the deceased. Continuing bonds contribute to positive mental health and lifestyle. It does not have attachment issues but a way in which an individual can be able to come to terms with accepting the death of a loved one. When my mother passed away, for a while I suppressed my thoughts hoping I would wake up from the dream but eventually I started accepting and keeping her as my imaginary friend and guardian angel. For example, it tells in Elisabeth Kubler Ross’s On the fear of death.

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Grief is a healing process that has stages, which you may experience in any order and any number of times. Kubler-Ross initially wrote in On the fear of death about the different stages of grief, paying most of her attention to the negative emotions that people suffering from terminal illness go through before facing their final breath. There are five stages in all namely, Denial and Isolation, Anger, Bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Grief is not a sign of weakness because when I was about to complete my 1st year of University, my mother passed away due to cancer she had been battling for years. Grief is a universal experience, just like everyone who grieves, I did not see myself as weak but strong enough to face it.

 Studies have shown that grief is part of nature that comes from a biological, cultural, and psychological perspective. Grief does not have color, age, or gender. There are different types of grief such as absent grief, chronic grief, and anticipatory grief. The disadvantage of grief is when one experiences chronic grief, an individual fall into depression and no longer functions in a normal way. Grief brings family and friends together who then offer support throughout the process. “Lean on me when you are not strong because we all need somebody to lean on, I will carry you always” is a song that means we find strength and healing when someone helps us carry the load and it becomes easier. In my personal experience, a support system helps the process of healing become easy rather than hard.  

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