Movie Analysis Paper: Stand By Me
One can’t choose the family into which they were born into, and they have little say about their neighbors or the people they work with. But friendships are voluntary, we can end them much more easily than we can escape the relational orbit of family.
The depiction of communication in friendships and types of friendships in the movie “Stand By Me” reflects the emotional bonds between four troubled boys who relate to one another. Throughout the movie they help each other by hearing and listening to each other to solve the root of their problems. The boys interacted by sharing their feelings, emotions and by understanding one another of their issues because they all have had a tough upbringing. As children, they were more comfortable with sharing personal information to each other. For example, when Chris was talking to Gordie, and Gordie is listening while Chris is talking about his problem and just by having Gordie listen, Chris gets to the root of the problem and opens up by releasing his built up sadness and frustration by letting himself become vulnerable and cry. When they reflect on their feelings they don’t judge one another, and they try to help each other when one feels like they are the cause of the problem. They console and defend each other because deep down they have a connection that makes them stronger. Children usually form more stable friendships, but primarily to meet their own needs and with little sense of empathy. During adolescence, friendships become a central feature of social life, often more important than family. All four boys bonded during the course of their journey, by just being boys. They rough housed and joked towards one another. For example, when they all decided to jump across a fence into a junkyard to sit under a bundle of tires for some shade. Also, when they accidentally measured the depth of the lake they were trying to cross and ended up in it and playing around. Those moments created shared activities, and by doing these things together they grew on one another and developed feelings of interdependence, showed appreciation for one another and demonstrated mutual liking. The closeness of the four boys grew from activities that don’t always depend heavily on disclosure, having a person to do things for them and with them also helped them when either one of them needed it the most. For example, when Teddie had an opportunity to commit suicide by standing in front of the train, and he sounded so committed that the others believed him, they tried to talk him out of it but he was set on his way, but then Chris automatically took action and pushed him off the rails and told him what he did wasn’t the right thing to do, but then later reassured Teddie that they are still friends and that nothing has come between them by doing their secret hand shake. Like a relationship, a friendship needs commitment from the participating parties as well, not quite as much intense as a relationship but still firm and realistic so that the friendship does not end.
In conclusion, some friendships last for years or even a lifetime, while others fade or end because of life changes such as finishing high school, moving to a new location, or switching jobs. In this case, even after the boys departed and never spoke again, they still treasured the time and friendship they had when they were together. What I learned from this movie is that a friendship is more than people communicating and having a certain closeness, it’s a symbol of people who have a close bond.