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The Good In The Bad

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What is bullying? Dan Olweus, the author of “Bully/Victim Problems in School: Facts and Intervention,” characterized bullying using three criteria: “(a) it is aggressive behaviour or intentional “harmdoing”; (b) which is carried out “repeatedly and over time” and (c) in an interpersonal relationship characterized by an imbalance of power”(496). Bullying comes in many forms such as direct bullying where the bully bullies the victim face to face. Indirect bullying which is bullying in the form of talking behind the victim’s back or spreading rumors. Due to the fact that bullying does take so many forms, it is hard to predict the effect bullying will have on an individual. Those with severe and long-term bullying experiences have high chances of becoming depressed, dropping out of school, having anxiety, or low self-esteem. In a few cases, bullying can even lead to the victim taking his/her life.

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Bullying is a disadvantage, but let’s look at the advantages that come out from it. Speaking from personal experiences no one can escape being a victim of bullying. However, it’s about the way you carry yourself when being bullied. Do you let it drag you down or do you rise up? Not only does being a victim of bullying have its benefits, but being to bully can change you for the better. Bullies don’t wake up one day and think let me go bully so and so they also have issues of their own that lead them to be one. Becoming a bully is the outcome of alcohol Kryzhanivska 2 consumption, substance abuse, and poor compatibility in school and they suffer both social-emotional problems and behavioral problems (Najafi, Kermani Mamazandi, Akbari Balutbangan 402). As we know those who are bullied are all affected differently, so let’s focus on one outcome at a time and see the good in the bad.

One result of bullying is low self-esteem. When increasing one’s self-esteem to move on from being a victim assertiveness starts to show. Assertiveness plays a key role in people’s ability to be able to set boundaries and learn to choose for themselves and not be swayed by others. In history classes, we learn about Rosa Parks and her contribution to the civil rights movement. Rosa Parks was a woman that refused to give up her set to a white passenger during the time of segregation in Alabama. She was arrested and then started the Montgomery Bus Boycott an influential part of the civil rights movement. Park’s assertiveness to choose that she was going to sit where she wanted to because she had enough of always being discriminated against lead to U.S Supreme Court ruling that segregated buses were unconstitutional. The places assertiveness will take you is limitless. Just look at any celebrity, professional athlete, or business person. Every single one of them has established boundaries and do what they feel is right from them even if others disagree.

Assertiveness contains a by-product which is confidence. Self-confidence is a must to be successful. No success can come from someone who doesn’t think their efforts are enough. Confidence is also the ability to fail, learn from mistakes, and keep going. Anyone with internet access today knows who Elon Musk is, but most don’t know how he can to be such a powerful and wealthy person. Musk was severely beaten and bullied while attending school in South Kryzhanivska 3 Africa. At the age of 23, Musk started his first company Zip2. After Zip2 was sold to Compaq for over 300 million dollars, Musk started his next company X.com better known to us as Paypal. After his time with Paypal, Musk started another company by the name of Space X. Space X is where Musk’s self-confidence really showed because while trying to create rockets that were cheaper and reusable. After many failed attempts and millions wasted, Musk finally landed a rocket back on its launch pad and made history in 2015. He would have never made history if he had no self-confidence and gave up when people told him to quit and stop wasting his money. Today Musk is a billionaire and his fortune is continuing to grow because he is willing to take risks while others play it safe.

It’s no secret that bullying is a problem and from a young age we are taught to deal with our problems with problem-solving. If a victim still hasn’t built up the confidence to stand up to their bully they find a way to avoid the problem as a whole or find ways to work through it with the help of others.

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